13th August, 2009 - Cilla - You Got It Wrong

I have never been on a blind date. It seems unlikely that I ever will, and that is something I am fairly pleased about. It seems to me to be a completely terrifying prospect. Frankly, all of my own first dates have usually involved people that I know very well and extremely large quantities of alcohol. In fact, they were not so much dates as drinking sessions that morphed imperceptibly into a snog. (How did you and mummy meet daddy? Well – I think it was in the toilet at a New Year party,, but it’s all a bit hazy son. We were playing twister for a bit too.)

That seems to me to be the correct way to meet your future partner – stoke up on booze and then, in some very dark party, where you are fairly certain that your acne is somewhat disguised by the lighting, move in for the kill.