Entry for December 15, 2006

There is a festive atmosphere in the office today. It's our Christmas night out tonight, so all the staff have beetled off home early to put on their best bib and tucker, have a preparatory snifter, and prepare themselves to berate their employers for the evening.
The general advice for employers for Christmas parties is "Arrive early, drink little and leave early." I do not hold with that view. My own advice is "Insist on more sprouts. Drink enough to feature on a Scottish Executive advert about the dangers of binge drinking. And fall asleep on the mini bus home." Advice like that has served me well over the years.
Although I have now gone over to the dark side in the great employer/employee divide and, on an intellectual level, I understand that it is actually me and my partners that are paying for the evening, I still believe deep in my heart that the Christmas night out is a big free bevvy session, possibly paid for by Santa or the Baby Jesus.
I do not wish to insult either Santa or the Baby Jesus and intend to take full advantage of their largesse. Please ask the mini bus driver to wake me when he reaches Baillieston.