Entry for 3rd October, 2008 - Burberry Pom Poms

At the kids’ party I was at today (I know, I know – my life is a hectic social whirl) there were a couple of feckless hoodies hanging around, looking mildly sociopathic. I didn’t think much of it at first (the party was in Airdrie after all ) but by coincidence, there was an eighteen month old baby at the party, and he too was wearing a hoodie. The only difference was that his hoodie had a rather nice baby blue pompom on it.
It got me thinking that, if we really wanted to prevent hoodie-crime, then we could do worse than persuade the manufacturers of sports leisurewear to ensure that all of their hooded tops have pom poms on them. It seems to me that, a man with a pom pom on his head is unlikely to engage in violent crime. How many shots of urban unrest show gangs of unruly youngsters with woolly pom poms shoogling in the glow from the petrol bombs? I rest my case.
If I was Gordon Brown – and I know he is a regular reader of this blog – I’d be giving me a phone right now, and seconding me onto the new Home Office team “Pom Poms for Social Change”.