Entry for 2nd January, 2008

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40 Cups of Tea With 40 Friends
is my goal in life.
And it must be done before 10th July.
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There are two words that strike terror into the heart of any lawyer.
Neighbour Dispute.
If you see these words on the front of a file, your heart sinks. You can be fairly sure that at least one of the parties to the dispute is an obsessive compulsive who becomes sexually aroused by his collection of ordnance survey maps from the seventeenth century showing the march boundary of Auldshite Farm’s turnip field. If you’re lucky, the obsessive is on the other side of the case: if you’re unlucky, he’s your client.
One of the lawyers in my office is dealing with one of these cases just now. I was checking the file today, and noticed that the headings in the recent letters had been wrongly headed. Her secretary had clearly not quite heard the dictation. Instead of “Neighbourhood Dispute”, all the letters had been headed “Neighbourhood Feud”. Perhaps it was not a mistake.