Entry for 16th August, 2008

I don't usually answer internet chain thingies, but I did tonight sice I thought it might make for a cheap blog entry. Here are the 25 randome facts about me -
1. My earliest memory is doing a jobby in some plastic pants whilst walking over Cadzow Bridge.2. I am not phobic about moths. My fear is not irrational. They actually can kill you with their satanic moth dust.3. I have a plastic buckle sewn into the back of one of my eyes. 4. I have had a book published. 5. I have written a novel. It is rubbish.6. I am superstitious. Amongst other things I never use the number 13 in a list (and none of my plays includes a scene 13); I always tip my hat to Magpies; and I will not put shoes on the table. 7. I am in substantial credit at on-line Poker. I put my success down to tipping my hat to magpies.8. I am addicted to self-improvement books. The evidence appears to be that they are not working for me. Except the ones about poker.9. My script was rejected by "River City". I know where I stand in the hierarchy of writers. I suspect that a moth in disguise is the script editor for BBC Scotland.10. The most exciting place in the world is the theatre in the little space between when the lights go down and the curtain comes up. 11. I feel most at home behind a set in a theatre when a show is running on the other side of the flats.12. I don't want to retire. Or die.13. (Scene missing)14. I worry a bit about the implications of an ever-expanding universe.15. I share SAM's views about the best place in the world.16. I don't entirely understand why I work so hard. All I want to do when I am old is read books, buy CDs and sit in a caravan with the Mrs. These do not seem like they will be all that expensive.17. i wouldn't mind if the caravan was in cannes mind you. Or indeed, if it wasn't a caraven but a luxury villa.18. I have at least 11 bank accounts. You have to start saving up for your caravan somehow.19. I still think that sticking two chips under my top lip and pretending to be a vampire is funny.20. The punchline to my favourite joke is "Aye! It's a beauty isn't it!"21. I secretly know that when I ask my daughter whether she just pumped, that she is lying when she says "No - it was Barnaby". Barnaby is an imaginary bear. His pumps do not smell like that.22. I wish I had the guts to dye my hair blonde.23. I am undecided on the issue of predestination. If you add up the position and velocity of everything in the universe, is the position and velocity of everything in the next millisecond a foregone conclusion? Or can we affect these things by the interposition of our free will? For example, if you start out by doing a jobby on Cadzow Bridge in your plastic pants, are you automatically going to wind up 40 years later sweating over a stupid list of 25 random facts when you should be in bed. This question, like the expanding universe, worries me a bit from time to time. Not as much as the moths though. And I can always cheer myself up by being the chp vampire if it all gets too much.24. I do not dress like I do to try to look like I fell out of a bin. I actually thought this outfit looked good together. 25. Sometimes I wish I could get away with blaming Barnaby for stuff.