Entry for 13th June, 2008

As a parent, you like to think that you are the centre of your children's world; that you are the person around which their little universe is constructed. This, of course, is not true.
The Round-Faced Girl, for example, is currently prone to the odd tantrum. At the moment, she has an irrational fear of the shower. As bath time approaches, she looks at me with a look of terror and repeatedly says "No shower; no shower; no shower," before bursting into a floods of tears. When this happens, you try to appeal to her, saying things like "Don't worry - no shower tonight," or "It's ok darling - it won't hurt," or "For the love of God stop that racket before I crack you wailing wretch."
However, I have discovered a secret. It is a sad secret in some ways but a useful one. The secret is that the rulers of my daughter's universe are not me and my Significant Other, but Maxi and Milli the enormous purple stuffed puppets from the Caravan Park we visited in April.
I know this to be true because, in a moment of desperation, during a "No shower" tantrum, I said "Maxi and Milli don't like wee girls who cry." This immediately stopped the tears, and the Round-Faced Girl looked up at me verry seriously and said:" Daddy. Maxi and Milli don't like wee girls who cry."
She then stepped into the bath without further ado. I washed her hair feeling rather redundant.